Taking Time For Me

            I might be a really happy girl tomorrow! I was reading through my surgery materials, and I think that I misunderstood the liquid diet preparation.  I MAY be able to stay on full-protein and only do clear liquids the day before surgery.  I am definitely calling the office to find out.  If so, I can stock up on some more protein shakes! Boy, funny how happy that would make me, LOL.  Fingers crossed. . .

            I am really hungry for peanut butter tonight. Not pizza or chicken or burgers.  Peanut butter.  I love it. I hope that I can still tolerate it after surgery.  I didn’t get fat eating cakes and cookies and other junk food; I got fat because I like FOOD.  Particularly mashed potatoes, corn, cheese, bread, and other glorious carbs.  However, often when I wanted something sweet, I would have a spoonful or two of an all-natural or reduced fat peanut butter.  Such a treat.  Another low-fat treat that I enjoy is taking a banana and dipping it into sugar-free hot chocolate mix.  It has just enough sweetness to satisfy a craving, but isn’t a million calories like some other desserts. 

            But I really do like food. I mean, I am part Italian, right? Everything we do in life revolves around food and drink.  Had a good day?  Let’s eat! Had a bad day? Here, have a cookie and feel better!  Someone dies? Eat. Someone is born? Eat.  It’s in my blood.  The great thing about this new beginning is that I will still be able to enjoy food, but I will be in much better control of my enjoyment.  I have been energized by the weight loss so far, and have begun to look forward to my small exercise efforts.  I used to love exercising, but when I crossed the 200 mark, it became so uncomfortable that I stopped making it a priority.    

            Plus, I am so crazy busy that I do not make myself a priority.  I think that goes with being a woman. We ladies are such caretakers; I want to make sure everyone else is taken care of before I worry about myself. It seems so selfish to say that I am going to do something for me.  I am getting my hair done and a manicure/pedicure on Friday.  I am singing in a friend’s wedding Saturday (Congrats Jena & Tim!) so that is part of it, but I want to treat myself because I am going to feel a little rough as I heal.  I want to feel good about my appearance.  There is a part of me that has felt that since I was overweight, I don’t deserve to spend money on my appearance.  I am no longer going to think that way.  I am going to start making myself a priority because I know that I am a good person and I deserve it. 

            Even though these two weeks before surgery may have been and might still be a bit challenging, I am looking at them as a chance to “wipe the slate clean,” so-to-speak.  I am ridding my body of carbs and fats and other elements that are not healthy for me, including the perspective that I must put myself last. After surgery, I can start fresh, reacquaint my body with food in a much healthier way, and begin to make sure that I take care of me with as much gusto as when I take care of everyone else.

            And that is what everyone reading should do, too -- take time for YOU.