How the Journey Began

            My weight has always been an issue to me and for me.  I was a healthy child, but sometime around 8^th grade, I gained a good bit of weight.  In 9^th grade, I lost a lot of weight.  I became fanatical about staying thin, weighing myself several times a day, and not letting my weight get over 100 pounds.  In college, I did not go above 125 pounds.  I ran, rode my bike, went to the gym, and diligently watched what I ate.  This was easy the way of life for years . . . until graduate school.  Life became insanely chaotic with three jobs, classes, thinking about paying bills, getting a job, and all of the other stressors of adult life.  Not to mention that I was getting older.  I earned my MA, got a job, got married, and kept battling the diets and the bulge. 

            Then I got divorced.  I was 200 pounds.  Twice the size that I was when I graduated from high school.  I vowed to lose the weight and walked on the treadmill every day.  However, there was teaching and coaching and tutoring and, well, some depression.  After all, I was 32 and getting divorced.  Talk about feeling like a failure, like I let everyone down, embarrassed.  So, the stress added to my issues and the weight did not come off.  It came on.  I would try this and try that, but I just could not get control of it.  Other health issues were introduced to the equation, too -- high blood pressure, carpel tunnel, arthritis.  Despite efforts, I continued to gain a pound here, a pound there.  Then, I met a fantabulous man who loves me even though I am overweight, and he has stood by me as I have gained and gained.

            I know that I am a good person.  I work hard and do my best.  I sing well. I teach well.  I can act pretty well, too.  But I am so uncomfortable.  There is such a huge part of me that feels that I am so far gone, what’s one more cookie? Yet, I am not ready to give up and am ready to start again, this time with a strong support system.  Knowing that it was time to do something, and I mean do something, I went to an informational meeting about bariatric surgery.  I am medically deemed morbidly obese, so it is covered by my insurance.  I decided to do it.  To have gastric bypass surgery.  To start my journey to a new beginning.

            Believe me, this was a six-month beginning with a lot of thinking . . . and a lot of thinking.  The Bariatric Center is such an incredible resource and has a program in place to guide patients through the six-month preparation process.  Each month, I met with a dietician and discussed goals, diet, and what to expect before and after surgery.  The supplements that would be needed, the fact that I had to lose weight or the surgery would be cancelled.  I had the many tests required for bariatric surgery clearance - plus a few extras!  I met with an exercise physiologist and a psychiatric counselor.  I met with the surgeon.  I talked to friends and told everyone that I was having it.  EVERYONE has been so supportive and excited for me that I know there is no way I am going through this alone. 

            I have my pre-op appointment with the surgeon tomorrow (Monday the 13^th) and begin the full liquid diet on Wednesday.  Then, on the 22^nd, I start a clear liquid diet.  For two weeks prior to the surgery, patients have to be on a liquid diet to shrink the liver to make surgery easier on the body.  I had to stop birth control a month early, and I will stop taking my other medications a week prior to surgery to avoid problems with anesthesia.  Then, on August 29^th, I have the surgery.  It will be my new beginning. 

            I decided to blog about my experience so that my friends and family can keep up with me while I am recovering at home.  Also, I want others to know what the process entails, whether they are simply curious or considering it for themselves.  I hope to be honest, probably sharing a bit of TMI in some cases, but if I can’t be honest, it really isn’t truly a new beginning, right? 

P&L,

Lisa